I'm Gonna Cream Myself!
And no, this one isn't about my boyfriend for once

The Return of TRADE. My all-time favourtest, messiest, heaven&hell on Earth rolled into one night morning out is back for a one-off 15th Birthday celebration.

Trade, I salute you.

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Nudge, Nudge
Thanks To Khalid for the email

Bill Maher's closing bit the other night on REAL TIME WITH BILL MAHER, HBO:

"Mr. President, this job can't be fun for you any more. There's no more money to spend -- you used up all of that. You can't start another war because you used up the army. And now, darn the luck, the rest of your term has become the Bush family nightmare: helping poor people. Listen to your Mom. The cupboard's bare, the credit cards maxed out. No one's speaking to you. Mission accomplished.

"Now it's time to do what you've always done best: lose interest and walk away. Like you did with your military service and the oil company and the baseball team. It's time. Time to move on and try the next fantasy job. How about cowboy or space man? Now I know what you're
saying: there's so many other things that you as President could involve yourself in. Please don't. I know, I know. There's a lot left to do.
There's a war with Venezuela. Eliminating the sales tax on yachts.
Turning the space program over to the church. And Social Security to Fannie Mae. Giving embryos the vote.

"But, Sir, none of that is going to happen now. Why? Because you govern like Billy Joel drives. You've performed so poorly I'm surprised that you haven't given yourself a medal. You're a catastrophe that walks like a man. Herbert Hoover was a shitty president, but even he never conceded an entire city to rising water and snakes.

"On your watch, we've lost almost all of our allies, the surplus, four airliners, two trade centers, a piece of the Pentagon and the City of New Orleans. Maybe you're just not lucky. I'm not saying you don't love this country. I'm just wondering how much worse it could be if you were on the other side.

"So, yes, God does speak to you. What he is saying is: 'Take a hint.' "

Long Distance Lovin'
(I am sorry, I have turned into a silly, sappy, girl.) If I weren't so loved up I'd hate me. )

I am going to take the coach to Oxford on Friday evening to visit Richard for the first time. He's spent the last 3 weekends in London so it's my turn to make the journey.

It will be the first time I spent a night outside London since I went to Toronto to see my parents for Christmas!

I am very exited about it, not only seeing a new, reportedly beautiful, place but just spending time with Richard. I thought having a lost-distance relationship would be a bit easier. I thought, cool, I can have my own life during the week, but I just spend the whole time daydreaming about the weekend and checking my mobile for texts and my inbox for emails. I also feel like I am neglecting my friends a bit, although I suspect that's all in my head
--



Richard and I had an absolutely gorgeous time this past weekend, including the Colourspace Music Festival, which was wonderful (except for the screaming, hyper, children)

He brought me a dozen red-roses, a heart shaped lollipop and a marble when he arrived at my door on Friday night. We had a little, romantic dinner by candle light. (ugh, what's happening to me????)


We also saw Ladytron at Popstarz on Friday, who were pretty good despite their Kraftwork-like static performance. It's all part of the act, I suppose. I love their music, anyhow.

I did get to say this little tidbit:

"This is my boyfriend, Richard. Richard, this is my husband Darian"
You don't get to say that everyday!

Freakin' Bastard

I spent ages writting an entry about my weekend and when I went to Publish it asked me to relog in and it didn't save any of it.


ARGH.

If I had a dog, I would kick it right now.

Dear Sir


Letter taken from yesterday's Metro

Why is it that people who have trouble getting up in the morning are considered lazy but people who get up early and then proceed to go straight to bed when they get home aren't? Christina Martin

Amen.

New Beginnings

Well, so it is true about turning 28 year and Saturn's Return!

I've just been offered a job that I had an interview for a month ago, but was told later I was not successful. Apparently the person they hired did not work out for whatever reason so now it's my turn!

I start on Thursday on a 2 month probation period.

So new boyfriend, and new job all in a span of a week or so! Hurrah!

:-D

I arranged with the Scientist to meet in Southall on Saturday. He drove from Oxford to Uxbridge(West, WEST London, almost Slough) on Friday night to see a friend, from there he could easily drive to Southall and I would take the trusty tube and overground from Holloway (North, Eastish London) to get there so we could have a nice afternoon together.

He said he would call me in the morning when he was ready to leave.

The Scientist took his precious time. Eventually, he texted to say that he was having a lazy day but would be ready in a bit.

I got on with a few things at home, and a bit after 1pm he rang me. He said he'd left his mates house but had decided to leave the car behind as he thought London roads where crazy. He asked how long it would be before I was ready. I said I was pretty much ready, I would just need to get my purse and I could go. He said "Well, you better come downstairs and let me in because I've just arrive outside your door."

Me "....! You're really outside my door. now?"

Him "Yes. Are you going to let me in?"

Me "Oh my god, the place is a mess...!"

Him "Well, do you want me to wait 5 minutes so you can tidy up?"

Me "Uh...I better go let you in"

So hung up and rang downstairs and out into the front hall. I opened the door still holding my landline. There stood Richard, with a bouquet of flowers. I pretty much threw myself at him. He'd taken public transport all across London, which took an hour and half, to see me. I was stunned but thrilled to see him.

I'll leave it at that, I'm sure your imagination can fill in what happened after that...

Don't I Just...Make You Sick

The Scientist and I have kept in touch every night since he left here on Sunday, plus several text messages a day.

We're going to try and squeeze in a visit on Saturday afternoon. We both have plans and it may mean going to...Uxbridge....but it'll be worth it.

In other news, I've ordered myself a webcam from Amazon. A Logitech QuickCam Pro 4000. I did a bit of research and it seems to come up consistantly as a very good model. Now I will be able to chat to my family and friends in Canada and Argentina!!

Bendy Me

Yoga was much easier than I expected. My initial fears of the teacher being odd where dismissed once we started. She had come in wearing high heals and a pencil skirt but she quickly changed.

I found that I was very good at anything that involved having my legs up in the air or over my head (what does that say about me...?!?!) but not so good at anything involving having to touch my toes!

I'm not sure I'll be able to go again to this particular class, as hopefully I will be working by next weeks, but I wouldn't mind if I could.

Assume The Position

I am about to head to the gym to try out their morning Yoga Class for the first time.

Hopefully I will not fart, hurt myself or stress the teacher out....

I would tell you the details about my weekend but you'd get vomit all over your keyboard.

I can tell you that I actually had a lovely time at thte JobCentrePlus yesterday. Everyone was very friendly and helpful. I think they may have been relieved that I filled in all my forms correctly, brought all the right paperwork, and spoke well.

I have been feeling utterly tired though, due to my period,and I feel like I need to lie down again now....

What Happened There?

I just had the most lovely, sexy and romantic weekend.

I shan't go into detail, but, Mmmmmmm Oxford Scientists are yummy...

Left Behind in New Orleans


Find Out More About thhe Operation Here or Click on the Image above to Donate.

Many of the people who are refusing to leave New Orleans are those with pets. The authorities are not allowing animal rescues nor are they providing them with any food or water.

Here is a report, which is distressing, from NBC.

Here is a harrowing article from the Telegraph.


Sign a Petition Here

Rambling

1. Summer seems to have caught a second wind. Trust me, global warming (or dimming whichever) is a reality. The last 3 weeks have been pretty much brilliant weather wise, and it looks like the temperature will stay in the 20s well into next week (although I know how volatile the weather systems over the UK can be.

We did make it to Hampstead Heath on Saturday, followed by a nice little party near Waterloo (but not at David and Albert's but they were at the party.)

2. I have faced up to the truth. I want to be a Hampstead Housewife. I want to shop at expensive and organic food halls, wear trendy clothes, smoke weed during the day, and go to yoga class.

3. I am being picky about jobs. Eventually I am going to run out of cash, and won't have that luxary. I was interviewed yesterday in a lovely company, with lovely people and 2K more a year than I was earning before but I am dubious because the hours are 10-18:30 and I will miss Hollyoaks!

Well, it's not Hollyoaks really, it's that it will be dark when I get home well into April, and it would suck in the summer. On the nicer days I enjoyi wandering through parks after work but if I can't even make it to one til 7pm? And I wouldn't make it to the gym 'til late either . It would also put a damper on mine and Andreea's weekly coffee meetings.

4. I am annoyed at my ex-colleagues, only my manager has bothered to contact me since I was made redundant. I knew that place was really quite two faced, but I didn't realise how much.

5. Freddie is going to be banned from having birthdays as long as I keep living with her. On Friday she did the usual get hammered at the Ben Crouch before crawling to Popstarz and refusing to leave or act reasonably until they play Animal Nitrate. Somehow, after much cajuling, I got her to leave before they did as she was stumbling about too much and annoying her friends.

On Wednesday we had a small soiree and few people came over. Only Freddie got drunk and was shieking like a banshee and being a bit too pushy and violent. She made us listen to the same old stuff over and over and screamed as it started playing. (There is a light that never goes out x 4, animal nitrate x 2, Save a Prayer x 2, etc etc) We managed to get the Kaiser Chiefs and Franz Ferdinand in there for a bit (we were just making sure it was, in face, 2005) but she changed them.

She managed to annoy everyone greatly and all left before closing time. I was left to clean up the mess while she jibbered nonesense to our new flatmate, Antonia, who didn't know what hit her.

Otherwise, she's actually my favourite person to live with so far.

Truth in Journalism

Pure Class

Alisdair put this picture together. He had a party about the 19th of August at his fabulous flat exceedingly close to Tottenham Court Road Station and CentrePoin.

This is what happens when you've been watching America's Next Top Model, come across Charlie and drink.

Ladies, if you want to be a star: NEVER PUT DOWN YOUR Drink. I'm classy, me.

Scroll across the bottom for the full effect...
Edit- 09-09-05: I've shrunk the photo so now it's a bit warped. It was making my webpage to wide and therefor a pest to read.

I've Got Good Friends

From:Liverpool St, David
Sent: 06 September 2005, 11:31
To: Little Miss Bitch
Subject: Re: Daily...Mail..

they have requested an urgent reference

so i have told them to take some time out, smoke some weed, do a bump of k, and chill out

-----Original Message-----
From:Little Miss Bitch [mailto:LMB@LMB.co.uk]
Sent: 02 September 2005 17:53
To: Liverpool St, David
Subject: Re: Daily...Mail..


Hi David;;

FYI- I have put you down as a personal reference for an agency called Tate.

x

I'm Clever, Me

Test from Here

V, your IQ score is significantly above average. Congratulations! You have a wide range of exceptional skills which are much stronger than those of the average population. You are also skilled at answering the types of questions that are asked in a classic IQ test. The test analyses your strengths and weaknesses based on your mathematical, linguistic, visual-spatial and logical skills. Even though you have high scores in all of those areas, we are able to analyse your results to discover the areas in which you have the strongest abilities.


You are gifted with the natural fluency of a writer and the visual and spatial strengths of an artist. Those skills contribute to your creative and expressive mind.

Insightful linguists can take complex concepts and articulate them to just about anyone. You have a gift with words and insight into processes and the way people think. These talents enable you to explain things clearly to people. Helen Keller is a great example of an Insightful Linguist. Blind, deaf and mute, she was still able to put things together in her mind and to understand complex ideas. She could do that because she was able to conceptualise ideas internally. Though she could not literally see, she had the visual and spatial skills necessary to understand patterns on an abstract level. She learned to read, write and ultimately became a writer on issues of social justice.

I think they are just being nice to get me to go back to their site so they can charge advertisers more.

BTW- My score was 126. I didn't put it at the top because I've scored higher than that in the past and I'm disappointed. :-(

MOBILE AGAIN

My mobile is up and running again, after holding for a long time and throwing a few tantrums (I have made tantrums into an art-form, I really have)